It’s Not Enough

It’s not enough to say I miss her.  It’s not enough to say my heart is broken.  It’s not enough to say I’m sad.  Some days it is almost impossible to put one foot in front of the other.  Some days it is hard to take my next breath.  Some days the ache inside me…

A Chronicle

This may seem completely obvious to everyone else, but it has only just become clear to me.  This blog has chronicled my experience becoming and being a mother, through IVF, the gift of twins, and the horror of child loss. It started as a way for me to get rid of all the pent-up residual…

Whoosh!

In two days my girls will be a year old.  I can’t believe how fast this year has gone by.  It seems only yesterday I found out I was finally pregnant.  Then whoosh…I’m in the hospital having babies.  Then whoosh…they are out of the NICU and we are home together.  Then whoosh…they started smiling, then…

Sleep Deprivation

People always tell the pregnant lady, “Get all the sleep you can now, because once that baby comes…” And so on.  I can’t tell you how many people told me those exact words.  Being pregnant, for the first time, and with twins, was an experience that was full of excitement and joy.  I absolutely loved…

Everything is going to be fine.

From the moment we found out we were having twins my husband was worried about me.  Both of us had lingering fear and doubt from all the bad news that comes with infertility, but even after that passed and we knew we were pregnant for real, he was scared.  He worried about me.  Having a…

These are a few of my favorite things.

When I was pregnant, I read article after article about what stuff I needed, what are the essentials, what would I need to buy in order to do the job right.  I felt overwhelmed by these articles.  They often had some items in common, but the list was so so long.  Even if I could…