I Can’t Even Say it Out Loud.

I feel a hand across my throat.  It’s not hurting me.  It is just there.  But it terrifies me.  I know what’s coming.  Every day it is going to squeeze a little bit tighter.  Every day it’s wpid-111.jpggoing to be a little harder to breathe.  Every day I am a little bit closer.  I don’t how I will open my eyes.  I don’t know how I am going to survive it.  I don’t know how I will exist.  That is the best way I can try to explain it.  I don’t know how it will be possible for me to exist on Sunday.

It’s everywhere.  I don’t watch TV and I still can’t escape the ads, the reminders, the “don’t forget about Blahblah Blah!” all over the place.  Everywhere.

I am terrified.


This might destroy me.


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