I just can’t.

daisy-reducedI can’t go to the grocery store.

I can’t watch TV.

I can’t listen to music.

I can’t be in silence.

I can’t be in crowds.

I can’t see my friends.

I can’t look most people in the eye.

I can’t do a job I feel I was made to do.

I can’t answer the phone.

I can’t stop my heart from racing with every knock at my door.

I can’t stay present.

I can’t stop seeing the doctor tell me over and over and over and over, “I lost her.”

I can’t help realizing that I feel a little worse each day.

I can’t stop crying.

I can’t care about the stupid shit I used to care about.

I can’t be the woman I used to be.

I can’t see.

 

 

 

 

 

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One thought on “I just can’t.

  1. My heart broken, intelligent, handsome son heard his parents talk about going to be with their girls because they didn’t know how they would go on without them. Right away he yelled that’s god dam unfair to me. I need you I miss them too but we have to figure out how to keep going until it’s our turn. He is so right there are a lot of people who need us so when we start to feel that way we see our son standing there yelling that’s unfair to him it helps us get through the moment.

    Liked by 1 person

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