In two days my girls will be a year old. I can’t believe how fast this year has gone by. It seems only yesterday I found out I was finally pregnant. Then whoosh…I’m in the hospital having babies. Then whoosh…they are out of the NICU and we are home together. Then whoosh…they started smiling, then laughing, then crawling, and cruising. And now whoosh…here we are at a year. All those parts didn’t seem to whoosh at the time, but now that they are behind us, I realize how fast time is moving.
When they were born, Bug was only 4 lbs. and Elbow was just 2 lbs. They were impossibly small; healthy but so so small. Bug’s leg was the same size as my thumb. When I would place my hand on Elbow, her chest would fit between my thumb and forefinger. And now, they are calling me Mama and shoving little handfuls of food in their mouths.
My heart aches when I think about how much time has already passed. I wish my memory was better so I would never forget a single second. At the same time, my heart bursts with joy every time I hear them laughing at each other as they wake up each morning. Motherhood is a complicated emotion.